I’ll get it out of the way right now. I am an organized person. A bit on the obsessive/compulsive side. Always have been. About five years ago, I started wondering what would W do if something happened to me and I was unable to let him know where all the important stuff is located. Then I projected out to our son B…what a mess I would have left for him to sort through. I had already seen snippets of this playing out with the loss of our parents. I didn’t share this concern with W as I didn’t want his feelings to be hurt….but he would have been wicked lost. So I created this bright pink 3 ring notebook that will be noticed in any bookshelf. It contains all important items…or notes on where those items would be found. For instance, our life insurance policies were too big to place in the notebook, so I put the most recent receipt for them in the plastic insert and then left a note on the receipt explaining where the insurance policies were kept. Creating this record allowed my anxiety to get below the raging point. (We will discuss my anxiety later.)
Since W’s passing, I have updated all items and have it ready for whatever comes along…evacuation, plague, pestilence, incapacitation….all sorts of wonderful topics. I know a lot of readers may think this a morbid occupation of my time, but it has given me a great deal of satisfaction and comfort knowing that I won’t have left a disaster for my son to sort through. Trust me. Grief is tough enough without having to figure out where “the hell” is the will, the insurance policies, the health directives….It is a hard conversation to have even with yourself, but listen to the Boy Scouts and be prepared.
The Missing Handbook 